


Life and Living

by icedpocarie



Category: Fate/EXTRA, Fate/stay night & Related Fandoms
Genre: Enkidu as Hakuno's initial servant, F/M, Gen, Self-Indulgent, hakuno has the best luck at getting strong servants, personal headcanon-ish, shippy-ish gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-30
Updated: 2018-05-30
Packaged: 2019-05-16 02:53:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,891
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14802983
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/icedpocarie/pseuds/icedpocarie
Summary: Enkidu gave Hakuno another chance at life. Gilgamesh gave her another chance at living.





	Life and Living

 

-

 

Waking up to a virtual reality without any idea about who she is, all that Hakuno was able to think about during the days of the holy war was her own survival.

When everyone around her had the potential to be her enemy, it was hard to move around without being more than a little cautious. Her servant had always been with her, guiding her with wise words and infrequent mood swings, but those she can take.

Hakuno can still remember the first meeting, after she ran away as death surrounded her – as dummies and monsters and corpses surrounded her. She remembers the want to survive, the feeling of desperation.

The wish to live, even though she feels like she has never known anything about her life all this time.

The one who answered was a charming person who took her hand. With a placating smile and calming tone, they held her hand as they appeared in a burst of light and asked, “Are you my master?”

Hakuno didn’t realize it at the time, but this moment was important – more than most that had happened in her stay on the Moon Cell. She didn’t know why – didn’t know the right answer – but she felt a powerful desire to live.

And so, she take his hand – his promises, and goals, and contracts, and everything else that went together with it – as she tried to return a smile of her own, “Yes, I am.”

“I know,” is all Enkidu says and just like that, Hakuno felt like the burden on her shoulders was immediately lifted. That one moment was truly defining for Hakuno because even though her brain was not able to discern nothing but vague, almost made-up memories, the servant in front of her said words that tell of a promise.

They didn’t say it directly, but she can see it in their eyes – the way they crinkled slightly, kindly – and how it says,

_I will do anything to protect you._

When Hakuno first met Enkidu, she was surprised with how they looked – flowing green hair and kind, kind eyes. And then, they had their first fight with an enemy and the person that she thought was a lancer all that time, turned out to be a berserker – cruel without meaning to, dispatching monsters and masters and servants without batting any eyelash.

With that kind of strength beside her, Hakuno felt like she could win the Grail War. Even when she decided to save a girl and thus, get the wrath of the opposition, she thinks that Enkidu will always be able to save her.

Because even though they may feel apathetic and unnecessarily neutral most of the times, she _did_ believe that Enkidu did have some affection of sort for her.

It was not only in simple matches and battles, but Enkidu had also helped her with the daily routines. From figuring out the weaknesses of the enemy servants to helping her discern the traps on the road, Enkidu had saved her countless of times.

In a way, Hakuno thinks that she would never reach this far if she didn’t have them.

When she tells her that, they only laugh at her, kind and endeared, as they say, “I wouldn’t go this far for just any master.”

She’d tell them that they were too much a sweet-talker and they’d shake their head before proceeding to point out that they _do_ still have a job to work on.

It was only in the succeeding millennia that Hakuno realized that the words they said were not mere lip service from a servant – that Enkidu had not been saying it because they felt obligated to, but because they truly felt the words they stated.

After all, a certain memory came back to her one day when she was spending her time in the city of pure gold.

An important detail in her journey – a big reason why she was able to go as far as she had.

On the day that BB decided to erase her existence – like the many others she had – with the black particles, it was the calm, cool voice that protected her from it.

Soft like the wind, bearing the voice of one who was truly godly, Enkidu gave her one last smile when they let her go and said,

“It was nice meeting you, master, short as it may. I wouldn’t be able to share any more part of your journey, but at least, find someone who will help you survive – because that is what I wanted, the moment I accepted your call.”

That was all they said before they unleashed their Noble Phantasm, letting her run free and she tried her best not to look back.

She did, but a part of her, several millennia later, still thinks that she should have ignored their warning and looked at them, one last time.

After all, since the beginning – since their contract was formed, maybe even before that – Enkidu had done nothing but protect her at all costs.

Enkidu gave her a chance at life, _again and again, and again once more._

-

While she had Gilgamesh’ battle capabilities at her side, most of the time, Hakuno thinks that she had a spectator around her, rather than an ally.

In fact, there were more than a few moments when Hakuno thinks that Gilgamesh is the most threatening being in the Far Side – despite what BB and the labyrinth masters do.

For the longest time, she shared an unequal contract with Gilgamesh – she gave up all of her command skills, and even if she gets over to the Near Side, her options would be more than limited.

She doesn’t even remember if she had a servant waiting for her – though it has to be said that Hakuno fails to remember _a lot_ of memories.

But even though she is reluctant to completely trust the man beside her, Hakuno thinks that Gilgamesh would have been the only one to help her pull through the miraculous feats that she had done.

From the scary fall in the imaginary numbers and stars to the moment where she was lost and desperate after seeing her comrades fall one by one, it was Gilgamesh who had been helping her even though it was mostly for her own amusement.

It was only during the time when they meet once again – in Gilgamesh’ very own Soul Labyrinth – that he finally recognizes her as his master.

And the words that he utters at the moment, _I will defeat you – and anyone who goes against my Master,_ is the moment that warm feelings crept inside Hakuno’s heart and she unconsciously decides that this must have been the same thing that her original servant had done.

With even a few more desperate tactics and reckless ventures, Hakuno reached the Near Side, only to feel a wave of both despair and sadness when she realizes that her servant was gone. She had a weird dream with a golden king, but Hakuno knew that it was _not_ her servant – at least, not the one she had in the days of the grueling Holy Grail War.

As she decides that _ah, this_ is _the end of the line for me_ and opens the door as she reconfirms that feeling, her eyes widened when she saw the man that boredly stared at her – despite his appearance.

Naked and smug, he looked at her with barely a smile and more of a grin as he suggests, “You’ll die without a servant – and I _am_ the only capable servant here, Hakuno.”

Hakuno realizes that the dreams were actually memories and she couldn’t help the snide retort that escapes her lips when she decided to lay out the contract.

A few more battle – almost eerily easy, in comparison to the death and despair-inducing fights from the Far Side – and she finally made her wish in the Moon Cell who held authority over the world where she lived in.

An exchange – her life for the independence of the world. She thinks that her acquaintances would call her naïve for that, but Hakuno thinks that it was about time for the Holy Grail War to be disintegrated.

Or at least, a war that was monitored by an administration that does not necessarily care about the life of those in the world.

When she closes her eyes, she accepts her fate – thinks that it _is_ a miracle that she hasn’t even died yet, when she faced dangers far more than any other – and feels her very existence dissipating.

At the moment, Hakuno embraced death.

But instead of the darkness, all she sees is blinding gold when she opened her eyes. She didn’t even have the time to be surprised because Gilgamesh immediately speaks up, voice eternally haughty, “What, you aren’t surprised?”

She is, but that wasn’t the point –

“The problem with you is that you lived without truly living. Your resilience is one of your strong points, but also one of your weaknesses.” Gilgamesh shrugs, like he didn’t just save her. He didn’t even point out how she should be eternally grateful, but instead continuing, suggesting things that Hakuno had never dreamed off.

“We’re several light years away and I think that this place is the perfect venue for you to learn how to enjoy yourself.” At that, the somber expression on his face dissipates to give way for a small grin, and he points out, “Be thankful, Hakuno, I’d teach you about the joys of pleasure myself.”

Hakuno laughs at that and like that, it was things were mundane, even though they weren’t. It wasn’t like Gilgamesh just went ahead and saved her life once again and decided to whisk her away to some faraway, unknown place.

She wants to say her thanks, but Gilgamesh looks at her like he already knows that she is thankful. Besides, with the way Gilgamesh seemed to ramble on – about how this world should be thankful that he is _gracing_ his presence – Hakuno doesn’t think that she would be able to cut him off, in any case.

In the millennia that pass, Hakuno lives with Gilgamesh, an unthinkable feat, considering the person that she was living with –

And just like he said, he showed her what being truly alive really meant.

Pleasures of the flesh, of treasure, of gold, of food – Gilgamesh _offers and offers and offers once more_ , refusing to take no for an answer.

He pushes her to her limit, makes her rethink her decisions – makes her reckless and impulsive. There are many times that Hakuno thinks that Gilgamesh is simply irreconcilable but even as he gives her smug miles and haughty posture, she knew that even if their journey together will end, one way or another, it was alright.

Because this moment with Gilgamesh was enough. And even if Hakuno ends up dying –from a possible fight or accident – she thinks that, at the very end, she would have think that at the very least, she truly _lived_.

At the moment, she didn’t know, but she thinks that there was one more being that hoped for her happiness aside from Gilgamesh.

She remembers warmth and smiles and kind eyes and even though the memories are vague, Hakuno hopes that she is living properly enough so that they would be proud of her.

 

**Author's Note:**

> I really, really think that Enkidu could have been Hakuno's past servant. For some reason, someone had headcanon-ed that before and I just... thought that it would have been a nice idea, lol.
> 
> anyways, omg... I've been drowning in mobage the past week, but for some reason, my mind also kept coming back to Gil/Hakunon and fate/extra in general. I've written drabbles, deleted them, then written some more while I waited for AP in my games to restore.
> 
> There were several plots in my head, but this one was the one that struck the most for me. And well... I truly liked writing this. 
> 
> Thank you for reading! PS. slightly unbeta-ed, since I always post my story without reading it over lol. orz
> 
> Also, I also am still very thankful to every author who had made a Gil/Hakunon story in the past and you guys are the best!! I don't think I would have gotten to writing this ship as much as I did if I hadn't been as inspired as I was. And any story for this particular ship would always serve as an inspiration to me. I love all of you please :(


End file.
